It has been ten months since I last
babysat this girl and I realize that her
face is a tomato: red and flushed and
round. Full cheeks. Wide eyes. Baby fat.
By instinct, my brain captures the picture
Nerves igniting: She’s gotten chubby
My wires have been programmed to
notice this first, it is embarrassing but
I cannot help it, at least she is cute
and funny, that mouth of hers!
Tomato-Faced Girl with an egg for a belly
is nine years old, sooner or later
she will notice these things for herself.
At lunch, she pushes her cupcake to me
I don’t want it, she tells me, eyes like a
basset hound, a flying saucer, you can eat it
I don’t want to touch it, it is my grandma’s
birthday and we will already be eating
cake in the afternoon. The cupcake sits
there dressed in its red velvet and cream
cheese ribbons, tantalizing. Mocking.
The kids these days all carry smart phones
and Tomato-Faced Girl is not an
exception. She is texting her best friend
inviting her over. The best friend wants
to know who else is there. Picky girl.
I have to take a picture of you, the
girl with the saucer eyes tells me
She holds up her phone, smile!
I know the right face to make, have
practiced it in front of the mirror,
when I was sure no one else was looking:
Mouth quirked into a smile; lower lip
hanging loosely (not too stiff now)
shows half a layer of teeth; raise the
eyebrows just a tad so no one makes
Asian jokes; ponytail swung over the
shoulder as a reminder I have hair;
I know this face so well, it is my best one,
the one that everyone else likes.
She’s coming over, the girl tells me and
I smile, knowing. Can I look at your
pictures? I ask, arms outstretched
and she nods, eagerly handing me
her prized possession. I click Camera Roll:
Two thousand, six hundred and thirteen.
The photo of me is on the top. I squint,
wondering why my eyes are always uneven
why only one has an epicanthal fold, but
the rest of me looks fine. My fingers swipe
away into the past: two thousand, six hundred
and twelve. She is at the zoo, next to the zebras.
In the mirror of a dressing room, with her sister,
dressed as air hostesses. On the bus to school.
Swimming. Dancing. I stumble upon the
photo of her in bed, purple pajamas complimenting
her red face. From the corners of the frame
her arms are cable car lines connecting phone
to torso, camera to subject. She is smiling.
Swipe. Same place, same position, but
her tongue is sticking out. Swipe.
Saucer eyes become satellites, open
mouth becomes a train tunnel. The Scream.
Hey! Why are you looking at those?
She is behind me, tomato face blushing.
No reason, I shrug. Your selfies are cute.
Her face somehow softens more, becomes a blur
My brother says selfies are stupid.
When did it become so complicated?
When did not hating yourself become stupid?
He’s an idiot, I say, reaching for her hand.
Fingers that fill up all my empty spaces.
|—||#selfie (via jemmatangerine)|
Like a good 80% of “social justice” posts basically boil down to “Please don’t do this because it hurts people” and motherfuckers still can’t handle that
I’ve posted this before but this gives me strength when I have none
IVE WATCHED THIS A MILLION TIMES AND ITS NEVER NOT FUNNY
Just wanted to pullquote the most insightful part of that dailydot piece from earlier today.(via stopitsgingertime)
Second, Israel is not required to account for specific purchases. Most countries receive aid for very specific purposes and must account for how it is spent. Israel is allowed to place US aid into its general fund, effectively eliminating any distinctions between types of aid. Therefore, U.S. tax-payers are helping to fund an illegal occupation, the expansion of colonial-settlement projects, and gross human rights violations against the Palestinian civilian population.
A third difference is the sheer amount of aid the U.S. gives to Israel, unparalleled in the history of U.S. foreign policy. Israel usually receives roughly one third of the entire foreign aid budget, despite the fact that Israel comprises less than .001 of the world’s population and already has one of the world’s higher per capita incomes. In other words, Israel, a country of approximately 6 million people, is currently receiving more U.S. aid than all of Africa, Latin America and the Caribbean combined when you take out Egypt and Colombia.
A tweet from CNN reporter Diana Magnay, which was quickly deleted.
CNN accidentally hired someone who does actual reproting
make this huge